As Facebook and Twitter infiltrate our social interactions, some things remain the same. Take going out on a date. You can make your date arrangements by tweeting or texting, but some things you still need to do unplugged. That includes coming up with a goodnight routine or plot about successfully ending the huge first date. And if you want a second one, how well you end the first date can play a huge part.
Paul A. Falzone, CEO of The Right One and Together Dating–one of the world’s largest brick-and-mortar dating air force with more than 60 offices nationwide—has corresponding hundreds of clients during his quarter of a century in business. So what does this like authority reckon about saying goodnight?
“You want to go into the date thinking things will go well. So it’s unquestionably not premature to at least imagine how you would like the date to end. That said, you don’t want how you say goodnight to turn into goodbye and that does take setting some boundaries for how far things will go,” said Falzone.
For starters, Falzone recommends:
? Meet at the place of your date – eliminating the home pickup and dropoff does reduce the likelihood of an overly affectionate goodnight. That can be a excellent and terrible thing. But if the date went well, not a dealbreaker.
? Goodnight kiss; handshake, high five? – See how the date goes and use your best instincts and discrimination. There’s nothing incorrect if the twilight gets a small amorous, that’s the thought. But going into the date with any expectations, even a peck on the cheek, is a mistake.
? Should I question for a second date? – The night’s gone well and you’re wondering “should I strike while the iron is hot and see if he/she wants to get together again”. Don’t. Avoid making plans as you’re saying goodnight. If it went well, do make plans to reconnect by phone, text or e-mail.
? Want to come up for a cup of coffee? – Again, use your discrimination. Is coffee coffee or does it mean a touch else? If it’s really coffee and you’d like to take up again the date and conversation, there are more than few coffee shops out there. Keep this date public. If it’s meant to be, there will be plenty of times for “coffee” at his or her place.
? Walk your date to their door or vehicle – Just a common courtesy and doesn’t mean anything more than you want them to get home safely. Don’t mistake walking them to the door to mean any more than that.
? And if it went terribly – You went out on the date and nothing. That happens. Just leave it at that. It’s a date, not a breakup and there’s really no need to make any declarations that you don’t want to go out again right there. One of the beauties of the technology we have is that if you don’t want to go out with somebody again, there are ways—e-mail, texting, and voice mail—to do it without a face-to-face confrontation.
“Having a goodnight routine is really about judging how the twilight went, assessing where you want things to go—or not go—and really using your best discrimination. And if all those things are helping, take it slow. As said earlier, if it’s meant to be, a succinct goodnight is not a dealbreaker,” said Falzone.