Its very hard for the celiacs (people with celiac disease) to swallow the fact that they need to adhere to gluten-free diet for their life. Many of them lack mental strength to accept this reality. Also, such dietary plans make many deficiencies in the body. It all starts showing up in the form of depression. But, with some simple techniques you can beat this depression for a healthy and enjoyable life!
People having celiac disease are evenly subjected to severe depression attacks. These may be because of three reasons. Firstly, they are not aware that they are distress from celiac disease and so they inadvertently consume a huge dose of gluten from their daily intake. Simple things like breads, pizzas and other wheat harvest contain huge quantity of gluten. This in turn affects their villi (lining of your small intestine) and their capacity to absorb elemental nutrients is substantially reduced. This results in mal-nutrition and gives rise to several disorders in brain. This can be simply termed as ‘glutenated depression’
Secondly, on realizing that they have celiac disease, they have to accept a bitter truth that they have to take gluten-free diet for lifetime. They are told to exchange drastically their eating habits and lifestyle, with complete exclusion of wheat. So they will be banned from eating all sorts of breads, pizzas, they cannot taste beer and they will be cutting most of the deserts from their diet. Its very hard to accept these realities easily. Their mind and body will resist. It becomes very hard for them to say “no” to all ‘glutenated’ foods every now and then, even if they are told by their doctor that these things can harm them. Gluten is very nasty nutrient. It will immediately show up.
Early from diarrhea and stomach upsets, it will make the person sick mentally and physically. So it will lead to glutenated depression.
Thirdly, even if a person follows a strict gluten-free diet, he/she may not be aware of the deficiencies, which such diet makes in the body. So he/she strictly adheres to gluten-free diet, but may not take in elemental vitamins and nutrients, wich would have been otherwise part of his/her habitual diet. So it will affect his body (mainly brains) and within a fleeting period of time he will start feeling empty and depressed. This is the third produce of glutenated depression.
Symptoms of glutenated depression
Depression, whether glutenated or otherwise, starts showing up quickly. Unremitting sad / empty feeling, loss of interest in general, fatigue and depleted energy, sleeping problems and headaches and body aches are the habitual symptoms. In many cases, overdose of alcohol or drugs are some of the consequences. So the shadow of depression is cast over the entire life ahead.
How to get rid of glutenated depression
With appropriate medicines and right strategies, you can get rid of glutenated depression. If you are tested positive for the celiac disease, then you should not waste time. In consultation with your doctor, you can work out a suitable dietary plot. This includes intake of certain vitamins and minerals which you may be missing out due to wheat restrictions.
Other ‘physical’ strategies include improvements in eating habits, taking ‘translation’ foods (like high carb snacks) and increasing physical activity, mainly exercise. There are some ‘precautionary’ strategies like postponing vital decisions, setting realistic goals and diverting your attention to a touch else. Then there are some recreational strategies like trying to stay social and unification a support group.
Note: This article is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for qualified medical advice. Please consult with your physician on any matters regarding your shape.
Posts Tagged ‘Bully’
Glutenated depression is really a bully, just face it down
Friday, October 1st, 2010DEATH to Old School Home Based Business Practices – Avoiding The Bully (Shark) Marketer
Monday, September 13th, 2010It is exciting to make huge cash working from home. Very few really do though for numerous reasons, and this article series is devoted to revealing why few succeed, how those that do succeed accomplish their success, and what you can expect if you really want to find success working from home.
Back to the sharks. When you get your returned phone call(s), you have no thought is calling you. But be sure of one thing, they are doing it in the hope of getting paid. Nothing incorrect with getting paid, but not everyone conducts business with the same ethical standards. In fact there are way too many individuals in the industry that will tell you whatever they reckon you want to hear to get you to go forward with their business.
The process is simple – they call you – tell you how busy they are – then give you some websites to go see and a conference call to attend. Simple enough, anyone can learn to do that right? Then they insist that they are professionals, insist that you be the same and be at either of a couple of choices of “appointments” with them to get your questions answered. You agree on a time and then you are off to do your research.
So you go to that call, check out the website – everything looks so excellent, but as a habitual person you have some questions; and you should. You are about to make a choice that is vital, and your time and energy is the #1 resource you are risking, not the cash. Cash is replaceable. Your time and your emotional state and shape is not.
You are really interested so you keep your follow up appointment with what seems like your undisruptive tour guide.. You have so many questions, and you are excited. Here’s where you can be vulnerable to the seasoned qualified you are about to meet. You are about to be 3-wayed to a name that has more experience at “closing”. They intend to “close” you, which means, have you pull out your credit card or you get sent to the bank to get certified funds.
Meanwhile you are thinking you are just trying to get questions answered so you can consider your options.
The call comes as scheduled, the person that you first spar with then tells you they are new to the business (in most cases) or says that they want to show you what kind of up line support you are going to get when you join, “so if you don’t mind, I’d like to bring in John Hammerhead into the conversation. He’s a fantastic guy, a lot of fun to work with, and very successful. He’s teaching me the ins and outs of this business, and will be teaching you”.
Now in your mind a touch is a bit amiss right? The yellow caution light is flashing in your mind, and your original contact person can significance new resistance developing in you; and he/she should. You built rapport with that first person that called you. You wanted to speak with them more, and now here comes a name you don’t know. You are about to experience the home based business shark bite.
Of course John Hammerhead is very busy so as you question questions, he gives you fleeting answers, and says “don’t worry – you’ll learn all of that when you get started”. Get started you are thinking? I’m just still learning about all of this home business material, your brain shouts at you.
Then it happens, John Hammerhead goes for the “BITE” (close) – “well let’s get you started?”
If John Hammerhead has done his job, all along the way, he has painted the picture that this is simple, just follow the “SYSTEM”, and we’ll be here to help all along the way.
Meanwhile you have not had enough time to Google the company or research any other businesses. You are not ready … John Hammerhead is ready and expects you to be too because ” he’s looking for decisive people”. Who is this all about anyhow? It’s about you, your life, your goals, your dreams – not John Hammerhead.
For so many people that is the first experience, you pull out your credit card and go to the website and sign up. You just signed up for your first home based business. It will probably not be your last.
At the end of the call you are congratulated for being decisive and committed to your future, etc. Meanwhile, John Hammerhead just bit a chuck out of your checking account. And you can be guaranteed that, if you enrolled in your home business this way, then you will nearly certainly regret it at some point, and write it off as lesson 1 at some point in your not to distant future.
My first experience at learning about home business was from watching a TV commercial late at night. I went to the website, place my information in, and nearly immediately my phone rang. People from about 8 different companies called me. I connected with one particular guy that seemed trustworthy enough.
I had very specific criteria. No selling to acquaintances and family and drop ship completely from Internet ordering were the headlines. Jim the “Vitamin salesman” was not resonating with me, but I figured IF it was perfectly turnkey online, it would just be a further stream of income. After all, people buy lots of vitamins.
Jack Greatwhite just kept saying yes. I went to their call. Everyone was making all this cash, it sounded fantastic. When Jack Greatwhite called me back, he by now had Bill Thebullshark on the phone with him. I was instantly in a 2 on 1. I re-capped my criteria, and told them that if everything I heard was right I was in. They said yes again. I ordered the “IPB choice kit” for $500. They got me to go ahead and signup for the marketing system, for a year (huge mistake), but I felt these guys were being trustworthy with me.
When I got my kit, the first thing I did was read the “manual” that came with it (very scarce for me), but I wanted to see their marketing model. And there is it was, on page 3 “group of Influence”, acquaintances and family, blah, blah, blah. Right about the time I finished reading the manual, I was packing up everything to ship back, and Jack Greatwhite just happened to call. I questioned him on the “drop ship” program and then he said I needed to either sell X dollars in product first (of course by having them all shipped to my house first) for a couple of thousand dollars, or buy my way in at a higher amount.
I confronted him, and essentially politely called him a liar. He back peddled and got Bill Thebullshark back on the phone, and they settled me down a small bit. At the time I didn’t realize they were trying to get me past the 72 hour period with which I could get a refund (which they successfully did).
A week later, I called to cancel everything, question for my refund (that’s when I found out that the 10 day period started when I place my credit card in the website, not when I expected my product evaluation kit. It was now day 11. I wanted a refund on the marketing system. Of course I had clicked on an agreement that said it was non-refundable. So it was a $750 lesson and introduction into the world of the perilous shark infested waters of MLM. One year later the ancient wound was opened and salted when the company that provides that company’s marketing system started charging my credit card without my consent. After an hour or so of my time on the phone, I irrevocably got the charges reversed. Unbelievable.
Are all people in network marketing and home based business sharks and pilferers? Unquestionably not. In fact, when 4 months later I looked again after responding to what I thought was a job ad in the newspaper. I saw the sharks coming and got back in the boat quick.
This total exercise though led me to find a business that was legitimate, and I was able to do very well at. But I swore to myself on day 1 that if I ever had to resort to those tactics to make cash, I would quit the business. (which I did in February 2007).
The best advice is take your time looking, don’t let a seasoned “Networker” (shark) bully you or make you feel inadequate because you want to “reckon” about a particular business. Thinking about it is exactly what you should do along with some Serious Due Diligence (Research). How to go about this is the subject of a further article.
I was taken advantage of because at the time I was moving “away” from a situation, and everything sounded better than where I was. By the time I picked my right business, I was moving “towards” a goal, and therefore no one was able to push or bully me.
Either you or a name you know has been the victim of a GUMP (Excellent Unsuspecting Cash People) hunter in MLM or direct sales, making much of the negative view of the industry.
Some network marketing, direct sales, MLM companies or other home based business opportunities in many cases have tremendous value propositions. Most do not, and they are populated with lots of hungry sharks.
Employment Law Can Tackle the Bully in Your Workplace!
Saturday, September 4th, 2010A recent Court of Appeal choice regarding the Protection from Harassment Act has made it tougher for employees to bring the likes of bullying directors and senior managers to justice. This, but, does not mean that companies should shy away from taking a hard line against bullies in the workplace, particularly those who hold a measure of authority – those in senior or management spot, for instance. Many Employment Law specialists are now in agreement that the Court of Appeal has in fact made it more hard for staff to stand a chance of winning a bullying claim with their newest ruling. But, despite this, employees still have plenty of options when it comes to bullying claims, so the ruling does not mean that companies can simply sit back and do nothing in the hope that the issue will disappear into thin air. Excellent legal advice to companies would recommend that it is elemental that you investigate and record all complaints and subsequent action thoroughly and interview everyone concerned, otherwise it is the company that could be on the receiving end of a claim, and not the person who is being held responsible. A test case two years ago found that an employee could successfully claim bullying under the Protection from Harassment Act if they could verify incidents had happened on at least two occasions. But the Court of Appeal has since ruled that these incidents had to be ‘oppressive and unacceptable, amounting to criminal conduct’, rather than simply ill-tempered or inappropriate. Even if this can be seen to indicate that the courts are now taking a more robust approach in determining what is harassment in the workplace, there’s no room for complacency if allegations of bullying are made by staff. Complacency could be the difference between quickly disproving any allegations of bullying made by staff and entering into elongated, time-consuming legal battles. A excellent way to do this is to have an anti-bullying policy in place and make sure all staff are aware of it. If allegations of bullying are proved to be right, it could be seen as advisory to take disciplinary action against those involved – whether they are directors or shop-floor staff. If a boss is involved, make sure that your investigation is not viewed as a cover up just to protect a fellow member of the board. You must also ensure that the person who is investigating the case is at a sufficiently senior amount in the company for their events to be taken seriously. It is also worth paying fixed attention to updates and changes in the law, even if it is just by reading the paper and checking a couple of key websites for the most vital information, as the law is a touch which changes on a fixed basis. As anyone who has dealt with them knows, legal issues tend to be extremely complex and it is permanently, therefore, worth seeking legal advice from a sound company if you are in any doubt as to where you stand in relation to the current Protection from Harassment Act or, indeed, any other acts. This article is free to republish provided the authors resource box not more than remains intact.
Learning How To Deal With A Bully
Wednesday, August 11th, 2010Most people at some stage of their lives will become the victim of bullying. People may reckon that this only occurs at school, but a lot of bullying also occurs in the workplace and even by your local neighbours. This article describes how I have learnt to deal with these nasty people, by playing what I call the nutter card.
At school I was an obvious target for a bully. I had a speech impediment known as a stutter or a stammer. I was permanently struggling with my weight and was larger than most of my other classmates and I was the shortest male in the class.
The bullies saw me as simple prey and I was. I was not sure how to handle these people and they made my time in high school reasonably depressing. I did not tell anyone of the abuse I was receiving and could not wait to leave at the age of sixteen. I have to admit that at this time in my life, I was reasonably weak and a bit of a wimp.
I believed that in the workplace this would not take up again to be a problem as I would be working with adults. How incorrect could I have been?
I was employed in an office environment and one of my duties was to answer the phone and to also make outgoing calls. Having a stuttering problem made this task very hard for me. I would evenly travel to work feeling physically sick.
There was one main bully who made my life hell, his name was Gary. Gary was one of the most standard people in the office, he was a bit of a rebel and the ladies loved him. He was a huge, strong man who loved to play rugby at the weekends. He would evenly come to work on a Monday morning bragging about how many pints he had downed on his Saturday night out, and about how many women he had slept with. I thought it was all rubbish and that he had probably stayed in with his mom watching the box. Other people worshipped him like some sort of God.
Gary constantly took the mickey out of myself and would mimmick my stutter at fixed intervals. I tried to not let it bother me, but it did. I let this take up again for nearly year and by now I was feeling very depressed and was ready to quit.
I then read a book about the subject of bullying and it wrote about a touch which they called, playing the nutter card. In the end at for example work, you can be who you want to be. Nutters come in all shapes and sizes and if you threaten the bully in a strong enough and influential manner, they will normally back off, as most bullies are cowards.
I chose to be courageous and give it a go. I could not physically hurt Gary as he is twice the size of me and twice as powerful. He does not know the people in my group of acquaintances though, I needed to convince him that they could.
On the day when I really went for it, it had not been plotted. I never really believed that I would do it, even though I wanted to. On this particular day but, the abuse was constant and very displeasing. I was really mad and clocked out of work and went to wait by Gary’s car, but hidden behind a tree.
Gary ultimately approached his car and went to unlock the door, as he did I jumped on his back but quickly fell off. He turned round with a shocked look on his face, but was pleased when he saw that it was me. I started swearing at him and told him that I had had enough. I informed him that a number of my acquaintances are a bit tapped in the head, but that they would do anything to help me. If I told them the abuse he was giving me, they would not be best pleased and would in the end beat him to a pulp. I warned him that if he ever took the mickey out of me, that I would tell them and that he would then have to wait for his punishment to take place. I then ran off shaking.
The next day I went to work in a worried state, I am pleased to report he fell for the bait and was as excellent as gold after that.
In close, do not let people bully you. Do whatever you have to, to gain the power back and to live life free of these horrible people. Excellent luck.
Start Your Successful Online Business with Ezine Bully
Monday, August 2nd, 2010You can make cash just like the huge dogs. You might at look at the people who are getting rich online, and reckon you can never be them. You might look at the people who aren’t rich, but are making a excellent living online, and reckon you can never even achieve that. But I’m here to tell you that you can. They all started somewhere. None of them knew how to publish an ezine previous to they did it. None of them knew the steps involved in setting up a website previous to they did it. And none of them knew the secrets of driving traffic to their ezine until they started. You’re really early out a step ahead of all of them with Ezine Bully. You don’t have to take the hard way to success. You can follow a proven, step-by-step method that will show you the fleeting, simple path to ezine profits. Does that sound too excellent to be right? I don’t blame you for feeling that way. After all, there are far more scams out there to separate you from cash than there are legitimate opportunities like this one. Maybe you’d feel more comfortable with affiliate programs, where you sell a name else’s product? But you still have to figure out how to do it, set up your website, get people to your website, and then get people to buy. And after all that hard work, you get a percentage of the profits!
Want To See This Awesome Program Now? Check It Out Here.You really can make cash with affiliate programs. But why on earth would you want to work so hard to get only part of the cash? With Ezine Bully, you’ll learn a simple paint-by-numbers method to making your own ezine, driving traffic, and making cash. And you get to keep all of the profits, not just a percentage. You could also make cash with Google Adsense. Make a website, place Adsense ads on your site, and get paid when people click the ads. But guess what? You still have to figure out how to make the website, what to make it about, and how to get traffic that will be interested in the things in the ads, so they’ll click. Learning all that is a lot of work. And you can make a few cents a click? Work smart, not hard. Get the incredible Ezine Bully report and learn the smart method for making crazy profits with an ezine. You don’t have to be able to write, you don’t have to be able to code a website, and you don’t have to know anything about generating traffic. Ezine Bully clarifies everything in simple terms that a 12-year-ancient could easily know. Don’t wait any longer for your huge payday.
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Bully Beefs
Sunday, July 18th, 2010Bullying at work can be traumatic for those on the receiving end. After recent allegations of bullying and harassment by Gordon Brown’s colleagues and staff, the public’s attention has been drawn to the increase in occurrence and severity of bullying in the workplace. A recent article in print in The Guardian back in February found that, in the last three years “over 70% of managers had witnessed bullying”, which has cost the UK economy an average of £13.8 billion per year (The Guardian, 2010).
The anti-discrimination legislation outlaws harassment on a variety of grounds, but there is no single piece of legislation dealing with work place bullying.
Unlike harassment and discrimination, which is evenly based on differences related to gender, race, disability and age, workplace bullying tends to arise as a result of personal differences or the (alleged) lack of competence of the bullied person. Bullyonline.org defines bullying as follows:
Bullying is persistent unwelcome behaviour, frequently using unwarranted or invalid criticism, nit-picking, fault-finding, also exclusion, isolation, being singled out and treated differently, being shouted at, humiliated, excessive monitoring, having verbal and written warnings imposed, and much more. In the workplace, bullying usually focuses on distorted or fabricated allegations of underperformance.
Bullying comes in many forms and, as an employer, it is vital to identify cases of bullying quickly and deal with them as soon as possible to prevent the situation escalating. Examples of bullying in the workplace include:
Whilst there is no specific legal offence of bullying, it is vital that you take steps to prevent bullying behaviour or it may lead to claims of constructive dismissal, breach of the shape and safety at work legislation or personal injury claims.
Both employer and employees can be ordered to pay unlimited compensation where discrimination-based harassment has occurred, including the payment of compensation for injury to feelings.
A well-designed policy is elemental to set out guideline of what the employers expects and what will happen if the standards are breached. The policy should give examples of what constitutes harassment or bullying, clarify the damaging things and why it will not be tolerated and state that it will constitute a disciplinary offence. Legal implications of bullying and harassment should be clearly stated and guidance given on how to get help and make a complaint, both formally and informally. The employer should make a stanchness that allegations will be treated speedily, seriously and confidentially and without victimisation
Managers and employee should be trained to know what is acceptable and what is not. Make it unquestionably clear that harassment, unlawful discrimination or bullying is not accepted in your workplace.
Employers should treat any form of harassment or bullying seriously not just because of the legal implications and potential financial liabilities but also because it can lead to under-performance at work.
As a business owner, it is vital to provide your managers with the right training in order to help them spot workplace harassment and bullying. Remember that one man’s joke is a further man’s bullying …..
Russell HR Consulting provides expert knowledge in the practical application of employment law, from dealing with bullying and discrimination, to managing discipline and dismissal. Stay our website: http://www.russellhrconsulting.co.uk/ for further details.
How to Handle a Bully
Monday, June 21st, 2010Speak Up!This article will deal with verbal abuse, not physical abuse, hitting, or violence. That kind of abuse should be reported to authorities immediately with out fail.Verbal abuse Bullying occurs everywhere, not just schools. It occurs in the workplace, gym, or any other place.We negotiate our way through problems, tests, and trials by words COMMUNICATION. When a bully is harassing a child (or an adult), words are of utmost importance. Silence is deadly.Many people believe that ignoring a bully is an effectual way to deal with their harassment. It is not. A bully thrives on the silent treatment. He or she enjoys tormenting and intimidating silent individuals more than others. The bullying continues and evenly escalates in the presence of silence. If your child is unusually silent or seems depressed after school, he or she may be having problems with a bully at school. Question questions. MOST kids do not tell their parents about verbal abuse bullying.The best way to handle a person who is doing petty insidious bullying is face to face confrontation. It will be a tense situation initially but the bully once confronted, usually leaves that person alone and looks for a name else to bother.Words not to say to a Bully-”Please leave me alone”, “Why are you doing this?” These words do not come from a place of power. They come from a place of dread, defeat, and helplessness.A bully should be told in a stern but topic of fact way, “I do not like what you are doing. I do not like what you are saying. If we need to talk with a counselor, we can. I don’t want it to happen again.”These words can be spoken to a coworker, boss, sibling, school mate, or anyone who is mistreating a further person. Most insidious “verbal abuse” bullying stop when openly confronted.Bullies who intimidate children and adults and threaten violence should be handled by the police. Immediately.Jean W.RawlingsCopyright 2007
Is your Child the Victim of a Bully
Monday, January 25th, 2010Everyone has seen the news tales, read the newspaper reports, and has discussed the real issues of bullying. For many of us, it’s simply a
topic of saying, “I’m glad that it hasn’t happened to my child.”
Or has it?
Many times our children are worried to tell us that they are being victimized.
This may be for a variety of reasons. They may be worried that parents will reckon of them as being weak. They may have been threatened that terrible things will happen if they tell anyone. He/she might feel guilty about ‘making a fuss over nothing’. Maybe the child feels like they deserve the bullying. They may also feel that they cannot talk to you.
There are a number of reasons that you may or may not know about.
We will try to help you recognize the signs and help you in resolving the problem of bullying in this article.
Bullying can include one or more of the following types:
threats, verbal abuse, being left out, name calling, harassment, teasing, hitting, pushing, and ignoring.
If you look at the list above and reckon back to when you were in school, you are likely to relate to one or more of these things happening to you
or a name you know. The degree and effect these events have on a child determines the action that we, as parents, need to take in order to help.
What to look for:
1. Bruises, cuts, or scratches
2. Sudden fears
3. Excessive headaches and stomach aches
4. Nightmares
5. Bed wetting
6. Worried to go to school
7. Changes in eating habits
8. Changes in sleeping habits
9. Withdrawn
10. Broken or missing possessions
11. Pretending to be sick in order to stay home from school
12. Mood swings
13. Abnormal amount of calls from school wanting to come home sick
If you see these signs, do not jump to the close that there is a bully in your child’s life.
Reckon of other things that may be bothering
your child. Has there been a split in your family? Is there a new baby? Have you recently went?
If the answer is bullying, it may be a hard subject for your child to talk about. How you approach the situation will make all the difference in how it is rectified.
Try a gentle approach. Your child may deny being bullied. This may just be an excuse to avoid talking about it. Let them know that no child
deserves to be bullied. Also, clarify to them that bullying is more than just physical events. Review the types of bullying with your children.
When they feel that they are in danger, reassure them that asking for help is not tattling.
Your child may be too distressed to talk about it. Try to avoid pressuring them into giving you all the information at one time. Let your child know that you want to help and you are willing to listen anytime he/she wants to talk.
You may get mad yourself about the bullying, but be careful. It’s okay to say to your child that you are upset or mad, but remain cool. Your child will feel safe when they know that you are in control of your emotions and the situation.
Whatever you do, don’t dismiss the bullying as simply a small teasing.
Your child could be feeling a lot of stress. When a child is bullied, whether it is verbal or physical, it is crushing and can hurt self-esteem as well as overall mental shape.
Sometimes it is not a further child that is being the bully; it might be an adult. For example, it could be his/her teacher, a neighbor, or a friend’s parent. In any event, tread lightly as you uncover the problem. Once you know who the bully is, you must have a plot to defeat the problem.
The key is to make sure your child feels secure as you remedy the bullying situation.
If you have single-minded that your child has become the victim of a bully, then you MUST intervene and right the problem.
The question is, how?
It is hard to reason with a bully. They tend to be very troubled children with poor social skills and tumultuous family situations. Most of them crave affection and acceptance.
Please don’t advise your child to ‘fight back’. He/she could get hurt. The very nature of bullying is that it is done by a person or a group of people who have power over their victim in some way – either physical, through size or strength or numbers, or psychological, through surprise or manipulation. Children who are bullied feel powerless in those situations and have very small chance of defending themselves.
The bullying must be stopped as quickly as possible. The longer it continues, the more likely the target child will become hurt both mentally and physically. Some victims ultimately start expressing their rage toward younger and smaller children, or in more violent ways.
Since the majority of bullying takes place in your child’s’ school, we will focus on fixing the problem there. By no means does this mean you can’t apply some of the principles we are talking about in other areas that bullying may be taking place. The first thing you must do is discuss what your intentions are with your child. Your child may by now be feeling humiliated and may feel even worse if you do a touch at the school to make self-conscious him/her.
Reassure your child that help is available and that this is not a touch they will be facing alone. Tell him/her that you will be talking to the school, but you will not produce a scene or make self-conscious them in any way. Discuss possible solutions with your child. Discuss all possibilities, no topic how unrealistic some may be. Talking through it can help you reckon of excellent possibilities.
Get a clear picture from your child as to what has been going on. Who has been doing the bullying? Where and when? How evenly? Any witnesses?
Have they told anyone? Keep notes so that you can refer to them when you talk with the school.
If you feel that the situation is an emergency and you feel that your child is in danger mentally or physically, you must contact the school immediately and set up a meeting. If there is a school resource officer, have him/her present. The parents of the bully should also be at the meeting. The fact of the topic is that the bully’s parents evenly deny the problem. They may defend their child and rationalize the behavior. Be prepared for this and keep your cool. Keep the meeting focused on YOUR child and putting an end to the bullying.
Reckon about what you expect from the school and question what the school will do to stop the bullying. Let them know what you and your child would like them to do. IE: Make sure that the allegations will be taken seriously and the complaint is kept confidential to protect the child. Suggest that more supervision is provided during break times and in hallways. Instruct all staff to keep an eye on those doing the bullying, and that adults will supervise those areas where bullying has taken place.
Question the school to send you a copy of their policy concerning bullying and make sure that the procedures are being followed. Also, question for that you receive a copy of the content and recommendations of your meeting in writing.
One very excellent way to deal with a bully situation is ‘Avoidance’. Coach your child on how to avoid the bully. Have him/her walk home using a different route everyday. Stay close to teachers on the playground. Come inside the minute that the bully appears in the neighborhood. Ultimately
the bully will lose interest in your child.
Sometimes it can help to talk to other parents you trust. Question them if they have ever had to deal with bullies and how they handled it.
In some situations, your child’s events may be unknowingly inviting the bullying. The child who the bully ‘targets’ is typically small for his/her age, sensitive, silent, and well liked by adults. The bully’s victim may not have many acquaintances; therefore other children aren’t likely to come to his/her defense.
A child who is feeling vulnerable is more likely to be picked on. There may have been recent changes to your home and family life, such as the birth of a new baby, or a separation, or a death in the family, which may have your child feeling more vulnerable. Talk through any family problems and listen to how your child feels about things. A child who feels heard and understood will feel more able to cope with the situation.
We have found through our research that many times a child who is doing the bullying has some problems themselves. There is a touch causing them to act in the way they do. They may be being bullied themselves, or have been in the past. Many times it is from their own household. Part of the solution to the bullying problem is to try and help the bully!
Even though you can not exchange what has by now happened, there is a lot you can do to help your child feel safer and to avoid being bullied.
The largest and most powerful is by building his/her self-esteem and self-confidence. The bullies will look for weaker targets.
Following are a few basic strategies you can share with your children:
Ignore the bully
Walk away from the bully
Refuse to fight
Question for help
We wish fantastic shape and happiness for you and your family!
Steve McChesney
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