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School Bullying Stopped: Don’t Be Fooled by the Smoke Screen! By
Paula McCoach http://www.bullyzapper.com

School bullies are manipulators.

They are masters at confusing students as well as adults.

But with these masters of manipulation, we must permanently look at
the huge picture!

Hardcore bullies will evenly try to confuse the issue when being
confronted with their bullying behavior. They will blame their
victim for the incident that happened between them. They will
bring up small transgressions that the victim may have made and
try to make them seem huge.

For example, maybe the victim told them to “Shut Up” and the
hardcore bully will make this seem like a huge insult the him or
her when in reality the hardcore bully has threatened or cursed
at the victim, and the victim was just trying to defend himself
or herself.

This Smoke Screen practice is one of the hardcore bullies most
successful deflecting attempts because it is simple for school
staff to get caught up in the details of the incident at hand.
And, the hardcore bullies are experts at throwing up the smoke
screen.

But through much success and failure at working to resolve the
bullying situation, I force myself to look at the huge picture
with the hardcore bully and not be deflected by the smoke screen.

In other words, I look at the overall pattern and large number
incidents the hardcore bully has participated in vs. the small
number of incidents the victim has been involved in – if any. I
don’t give the bully a clean slate in every incident – I believe
the best way to stop bullying is to deal with it on a cumulative
amount – not each incident individually.

Hardcore bullies are experts at throwing up a smoke screen and
making a “mountain out of a molehill” when they have been
wronged but minimizing any incorrect that they may have done to
a further student. But, now you will be able to see through the
“haze.”

Paula McCoach invites you to subscribe to the Bully Zapper
Newsletter in print weekly with tons of tips on how to
effectively deal with bullies in elementary and midpoint school.
You will receive a free special report for your subscription. To
subscribe, go to http://www.bullyzapper.com

Buy the newest Bully Zapper publication, 11 SIMPLE STEPS TO
ZAPPING BULLIES! Learn tips on working with the bully as well
as the victim, talking to parents effectively, using behavior
checklists with success, enabling teachers to deal with bullies
in their classrooms, and much more practical and useful
information you can use immediately to Zap the Bullies in your
school! To order, go to http://www.bullyzapper.com

©2005 Consent granted to reprint this article in print or on
your web site so long as the paragraph above is included and
contact information is provided to the email
coach@bullyzapper.com and http://www.bullyzapper.com